Reverend Philip Korsah, the third speaker on the third day spoke on  the topic “Living a God Glorifying Relationship”. By the same Spirit the main speaker had already dealt partially on this topic as He was led to preach on. He said, relationship is one of the topics the youth are very interested in today and it’s one of the best selling topics at the bookshop stands. The tiles on relationships are very much selling and that makes it very difficult to preach on when asked to do so especially at such a time as this.

He first begun by looking at the DNA of relationships since he is a biological student “to look at God’s Glorifying relationship we need to understand the basis of relationships” and as much as it is God given then we need to know that there is the genetic aspect of relationships. With the genetics we must know the phenotypic expressions and the genotypic expressions. The phenotypic expressions can be affected by the environment, cultures but with the genotypic irrespective of the environment the code is the same and as we live in a God glorified relationship we have to understand that at any point where we find ourselves we need to keep God’s standard.

He said there two strands of relationship. The first strand is that “you are made for relationships” and the second strand being that “you are made to take responsibilities for yourselves” and the basis that binds the two strands together is that “you are made with the capacity to choose”. His first Bible text was I John 4:7-11, 17 - 19. From this reading we are certain that when you are in a relationship you aught to love without fear so when there is fear in the relationship then you are not in perfect love but if you have this perfect love then you understand the DNA of relationships. He quoted a saying that “life without warm relationship is dull or lacking brightness empty and painful we are born for love and made to relate”. Love comes from God therefore if you are loving you are not doing anything strange because it is made by God Himself. But what matters is the manner of loving you love.

In Genesis 2:18; 1:4; 1:10 &12 God was using the phrase “God saw that it is good” about 8 times but in chapter 2:18…He said “it is not good for the man to be alone”. God did not intend us to live life alone or in isolation therefore we need not feel guilty when we have a desire for someone he said therefore, “never condemn yourself when you are craving for closeness” because being a Christian does not change your body metabolism but the only difference is the grace and ability to control yourselves. We need to have another’s warmth and when we crave for warmth we are craving for intimacy. There are about 8 forms of intimacy which include the following:

Emotional Intimacy is the delight of being sealed into another’s wavelength so when you are in a relationship you need to understand it from this view where you will both be on the same wavelength – the same level of reasoning for a common feeling towards one another
Intellectual intimacy it is the stimulus of discovering an affinity of another in a world of ideas. Intellectual as we are we need to talk of developmental issues and the ideas will bring the good out of us.
Esthetic intimacy is the joy of sharing and experiencing of beauty with one another. He said it is a fact that the women are more beautiful than the men. Therefore as we admire the beauty of nature we need to have some time to admire one another to God’s glory.
Creative intimacy is the fun and relaxation of relating in experiences of play. Things in the world look nice and you sometimes need someone to admire them with.
Work intimacy is the togetherness you have by sharing a common task. That is being ready to help your partner when they are in need
Crisis intimacy it is the bonding which happens when people tackle problems or pain together when a partner is in need that’s when they need you the most.
Spiritual intimacy is the oneness two people experience when they come to the fruit of the cross together that is both having spiritual mindsets.

There is a limit to every form relationship. We need to understand that in a relationship both partners are venerable. The society in which we live today is full of unfulfilling promises.

In certain circles casual relationship is encouraged and even applauded but this is worldliness at its worst living for sex, living for kiss, treating people whose lives are precious to God as toys” so when you indulge in causal relationship you are  telling the partner that you don’t respect them and you want to consider them as dolls. Whiles in the intimacy we need to be true to ourselves, the Lord and our brothers and sisters in Christ and if we are to create Jesus’ kind of relationship then we must bear in mind that we are vulnerable.

Secondly we must watch our thought lives. Our imaginations and thoughts make us who we are therefore we must be cautious about what we think of in our relationships. We need to free our minds. When our thoughts are so engulfed with negative imaginations of the other partner we tend to find it difficult thinking about positive things.

We have to bear in mind that our imaginations would continue to go wild but as long as we decide to have a pure imagination God shall help us attain that level. As Dr. Martin Luther King puts it “you cannot prevent the birds from flying over your head but you can prevent them from laying their nest on your head”. We need to recognize the difference between infatuation and affection so not to confuse infatuation with affections. We need to also promote the partner’s growth. We must encourage one another and help each other when the other partner is in need.

A few of the don’ts in a relationship are not depriving the other partner the joy of serving God diligently.
Secondly you need not commit yourselves by making promises until the time of marriage. The only commitment we can make is that towards God.

Last but not least don’t precipitate teenage marriage. That is don’t allow pressure from friends or family members to getting you into marriage.

In conclusion we need to be cautious in our relationships and be sure to lay the foundation of the relationship on God.

May the Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen.